Wishes Becoming Reality

Could it be possible that wishing can make it so? Or will it end up to be be careful of what you wish for as you may get it?

Mom IS moving back to Regina and it is stressful keeping her anxiety and upset at a low level but impossible when L plays her nasty selfish games all the while saying poor her. She is making it harder than it needs to be as she made it clear packing boxes can be around as they are showing the suite on Saturdays. Really? Yet in the next breathe you are saying that they deserve to get away. Um, she can fuck off if she thinks she can screw this up. I could be wrong but I think she grew more agitated as I kept saying no problem - I can pack her up and she can stay with me the last week before she goes if she has too. Frickin' bitch. She just doesn't see that we don't want much to do with her as she is so twisted. I realized that she talks in circles to avoid a direct answer and I come away rather confused. Within 24 hours of G phoning her to say he found a place for Mom, they put the condo AND their house on the market. They couldnt wait 3 tricking weeks to avoid extra stress on an 83 year old woman? No wonder that wonder Mom is upset and stressed and confused about dates. Now I am wondering if Linda started planting the seeds of Mom's apparent dementia symptoms so that she had someone in agreement that something needs to be done. My hunch that their whole motive was to use her as an investment renter but then learned mom is needing a lot of attention from people she knows. Had she bothered to ask me, I could have told her that. But she wouldn't have listened to me and in fact, would have used my opinion to fuel relatives negative opinion of me and to increase her own value. Sad, but even though they used to be favoured aunts and uncles, she succeeded in making them dislike me and value her. Know what? screw em. They can't be bothering to even drop me an email yet they listen to only her. Screw em. They don't bother contacting us other three as though we are useless and just mean to poor L. Yes, I am looking forward to having my time back but strangely a bit sad too. Hey, she isn't a bad woman. Just needy and clingy and can out guilt any jewish mama. I have to force myself to not burst out laughing when her voice gets all high and harsh and gets all "oh poor us, we work so hard and do soooooooo much, blah blah" Right... a million $$$ of property for sale and I'm to give you sympathy? Uh no.

Other wish. Well......:) . Well, no nothing as great as him contacting me on some ruse or even to admit he would like to get together but... Today, at work, a member called about an issue with her file and when she said T was someone she had talked to I realized I could include him in the email message to   my rep. Ruse on my part? In a way. But it appeared legit - basically I was giving him a heads up this potentially volatile person would be calling him. It didn't take long and he emailed me back saying he spoke to her and explained more of the situation to me. Well, okay and the rep. I emailed back thanking him for the info as it would help me if she called me again. I thought that would be the end. Nope. I got an email to that with a very nice, "thank you Audrey, you're very welcome". Not anything you say? No. It's a little something. He is not the sort to thank everyone for polite emails as I know he has butted heads with J and she said he can get really a bit grrrrrrrr. Yet I'm crushing so bad I think everything about him that I know - wonderful. Please let it be possible that he is interested / curious about me but doesn't know if he should push it or if it is even not a conflict. I just really really like him. And I'm watching for all opportunities to contact him without being obviously stalking him. Hey pal, you should consider yourself lucky - I don't stalk just anyone! Please, please, please have him make an initiative move. Fingers crossed starting next week when C is off that he calls and I get to talk with him. Please???

What if something does perk. I will have to forever from this point on, be very careful for what I wish and want. Maybe there is a power in wishful thinking. Maybe if it is a strong wish over a period of time that it works? Maybe if the same desire is there for a long time and deeply felt there is a stronghold and it starts to happen.

Thing is, as much as I would love it if he asked me out, it has to be his initiative. That is the only way I will know he is truly interested and not being merely polite and a bit curious. No, I need to know he is feeling similar notes of attraction as I do.

Fingers crossed. The next 3 weeks will be telling on both these issues. Hey, I could be sorrily disappointed and T not call once on anything. Timing could be he is on vaca. Could be L manages to manipulate things so that the moving truck doesn't pick up until half way through my vacs and she delights in wrecking my vacation with me packing it up.

Not negative, just realistic. Things haven't ever gone my way before, why would they now? Still, I'm taking the possibility of something new and exciting and wonderful starting with me to bed at night.

Pun intended :)